Tuesday, November 07, 2006

REWIND: Another NA (non-alcoholic) election day.


Don’t forget: You must have an ID to vote – and to get served.

Don't forget: If you're looking for a polling place, call the Floyd County Democratic Party at 812-207-7941.

Don't forget: When the taps open at 6:00 p.m., NABC's having a special promotion. Buy a signature NABC logo glass of Elector at the regular price, and keep the glass (first 50 customers).

You've forgotten, but the following first ran on May 2, 2006.

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Another election day is here, and with it eleven hours of state-mandated prohibition against the sale of demon rum.

Presumably, this unwelcome vestige of an otherwise discredited social policy serves as a bulwark against the horrific possibility that unscrupulous politicos or their conniving agents might swap half-pints of Kessler (or a similarly valued slopping spree at Hugh E. Bir’s) in exchange for a poor wretch’s vote.

As there exists no commensurate prohibition against the sale of strong black coffee, chocolate-covered Krispy Kremes and hickory-smoked bacon, apparently the veiled but very real threat of breakfast-induced bribery is not worthy of the same scrutiny as that posed by the insidious grape and the grain.

If you’re hopelessly intoxicated after ingesting that half-pint of Kessler, are you really any more destructive to democracy than the perfectly sober voter who is following instructions provided by a fundamentalist preacher who has promised not temporal inebriation, but a favorable reference when the time comes to take up residence in heaven?

3 comments:

antzman said...

The only good thing about this is that I get a chance to do some much needed maintenance on my walk-in cooler. Some new shelving and some creative re-arranging is in the works. This should result in me cramming a few more "good beers" into our limited space. Its a shame that it takes an antiquated liquor law from the 1800's for me to get this done, but so be it.

The New Albanian said...

Don't forget ... to tell readers that you're The Keg Liquors in Clarksville.

antzman said...

Doh!

Great point Roger....

You know what is ironic, roughly 30% of the people vote, and you and I have to close for a great portion of our business day....